Amy Brangwyn
Wanting, needing, and enjoying alone time is completely different from simply having a weekend without plans.
And when you’re a lone wolf, you know the difference.
Fiercely independent people (and introverts) have to be alone sometimes if they want to function properly.
Especially in today’s world, particularly the world of work, that’s mostly designed for extroverts to thrive.
So when you’re a lone wolf at heart, you have to make do with the world around you as it is. You also have to create your own ways to stay sane (and alone!).
If you think you’re a bit of an introvert, let’s take a look at these 8 behaviors you’ll definitely display if you’re a lone wolf!
1) Canceling plans to spend time alone
If you’ve ever seen “How The Grinch Stole Christmas” when Jim Carry flips through his diary and says:
“Dinner with me, I can’t cancel that again!” – before deciding he’s not attending the Holiday Cheer Meister and thought “relatable”, then you’re probably a bit of a lone wolf.
Spending time alone isn’t something that everyone enjoys – especially if you’re an extrovert who gets your energy from other people (rather than from within).
But if you’ve been particularly busy recently with plans the last few Saturdays, you might find yourself skipping the next social event just so you can spend time alone.
And wanting to be alone for a while after being around others is a behavior of a lone wolf – and also an introvert.
2) Choosing to eat by yourself on lunch break
Spending the entire workday around other people can be somewhat exhausting if you like your alone time.
Being surrounded by your work colleagues and hearing them chat away about their life’s troubles is a great workday for some – but not for others.
And even if you don’t mind gossiping with your colleagues during the workday, by the time lunch hits, you need some time by yourself if you’re a lone wolf at heart.
You’ll go out for lunch to escape the noise in the kitchen. Or bring your book to work so you can shut everyone out for a while.
Or you’ll simply slip your headphones in at your desk after declining to join everyone else in the breakout area.
Because even though you don’t mind being social, spending the entire 9-5 chatting to others just isn’t your thing when you’re a lone wolf.
3) Deleting the dating apps and staying single
If you’re a true lone wolf and just so happen to not be in a relationship right now, you may have decided against dating entirely for the time being.
Choosing to date others seems like a ton of effort and something you have to really want to do – not something you can just do “for fun” (like your other single friends).
So you’re happy to delete the dating apps and stay single (enjoyably) until you feel otherwise.
Because for you, right now, there’s nothing better than your own company – and you’d rather spend time alone than meet people you probably won’t click with.
4) Living alone, regardless of your relationship status
Living by yourself isn’t something everyone wants to do or even could do.
But when you like your own company, you can happily live alone – whether you’re single or in a relationship.
For example, my dad and his partner have (and maybe always will) live separately.
Even though they could move in together if they wanted to, they both enjoy their own company just as much as they enjoy time together.
They have date night at least once a week, spend the weekends together, and call each other most nights, but they don’t live together.
With 10 happy years behind them, the arrangement simply works.
And that’s because they’re both lone wolfs who like to live alone, even though they’re in a relationship.
5) Keeping secrets forever
When you keep yourself (and your secrets) to yourself, you also probably keep other people’s secrets schtum.
Among your friends, you’re probably seen as a trustworthy person who doesn’t blab.
Because the truth is, you don’t need validation from others in the same way everyone else does.
You simply don’t need to share gossip to be liked or to find something to talk about.
Instead, you’re quite happy to sit and listen, talking about yourself sometimes, and not divulging the details of everyone else’s personal life to stay “relevant”.
6) Rarely partaking in small talk
If you’re a lone wolf, it’s a rarity that you find yourself engaging in small talk.
When you’re in the elevator with someone, or are the only other person in a meeting, you’ll choose silence over small talk every time.
Because even though you can be social, you prefer deep and meaningful discussions – over any debate about what the weather is doing today.
7) Walking the long way home to avoid someone you know
I think we’ve all done this before, haven’t we?
When you’re walking out of the office and someone is heading in your direction, you’ll go a different route so you don’t have to talk to them.
Most people do this if they don’t like the person or have simply run out of social battery for the day.
But when you’re a lone wolf, you’ll do this all the time.
Because your commute home is your alone time and a chance to unwind.
And the idea of spending it with another colleague making small talk fills you with complete and utter dread.
So you’ll even take the long road home – even if it adds extra time to your journey – just so you can spend it alone, as planned.
8) Learning to do everything by yourself
When you’re a lone wolf, you’re fiercely independent. Before asking anyone else for help, you’ll learn how to do it by yourself first.
If you need to know how to defrost your freezer, you’ll Google it. If you need to change an unusual lightbulb in your apartment, you’ll watch a YouTube video tutorial.
You’ll rarely ask for help before trying to figure something out for yourself beforehand.
Because you like to do things on your own and don’t ever feel the need to ask for help and make conversation for the sake of it.
Final thoughts
Being branded a lone wolf isn’t always seen as a good thing by everyone – especially when you work a job that encourages networking, endless socializing, and time spent in the office.
But the truth is that everyone is different and there’s nothing wrong with liking to do things by yourself and be alone sometimes.
So if you spot many of these behaviors in your everyday life, I’m sure you’re not alone (pardon the pun). And it’s definitely not a bad thing.
Because being an introvert and having fierce independence can give you qualities not everyone possesses – and that’s something to be proud of!
