8 ways to show you love someone without saying a word

For some people, saying “I love you” can be a lot. It might take them a while to say it so it might feel like there’s no need to express it any other way.

But the truth is, when you’re showing love, it’s not just about you who is feeling it. You have to take into consideration the person receiving it.

Can they feel the love you are expressing?

Here are 8 ways to show someone that you love them without saying a word.

1) Surprise them!

Don’t scare the bejesus out of somebody.

But do show them that you care without having to be asked and “just because.”

This can mean surprising them with a clean kitchen because you know they’ve been exhausted all week! 

Or bringing them their favourite meal just because you saw it and thought of them on your way home from work.

It isn’t about what you surprise them with, it’s being reminded that you are cared about even when you’re not near each other.

That not only do you love someone’s existence, but you love the mark they leave on your mind and heart too.

2) Listen to them intently.

Spending your money on someone is easy. What really makes someone feel loved is when you spend your time with them.

You can spend your time with someone by making plans to do a shared hobby. Or work on a creative project together!

But you can also do so by just listening to them with your full attention and without judgment. That means not trying to make them feel better by invalidating their situation or changing their perspective.

This creates a safe space for them to exist and just rest. Which is so much more valuable than anything you can materially give.

It sends the message that you aren’t trying to control how they think or feel. And says that you love them the most when they are comfortable and being themselves.

3) Remember things about them.

Here’s another way to show that you were listening to them attentively. Remember little details and make the effort to read between the lines. 

There’s a saying that you can’t expect everyone to be a mind reader. And I agree! It can be manipulative to expect everyone to know what you need. But this isn’t about that.

Similar to how you can surprise someone with a gift, listening between the lines isn’t about avoiding conflict by mindreading. It’s about putting in the effort to get creative!

Because being creative shows thoughtfulness. A lot of the time, when people want you to read their mind, it isn’t because they actually want you to. It just means they want you to be a little more thoughtful.

So remember their birthday! Celebrate a silly anniversary of being together for 123 days. Gift them a photo of a rat to commemorate that time you guys had to exterminate one.

The goal is to add a bit of flair to the relationship. That you don’t mind going out of your way for them – even mentally.

4) Show them patience.

This one’s huge.

And it requires you to know your worth and show it to someone who really deserves this level of love.

Because when you show someone patience, it means despite what is present, you love them not just now. But also in the future.

We live in a culture where so many people want love but don’t have the emotional maturity to hold space for commitment.

Or perhaps they don’t have the right boundaries to seek the right person to commit to.

Whatever it may be, it’s rare to find someone that sticks around because they don’t expect you to be perfect. 

That they aren’t staying “despite your flaws” but because they understand all the best parts of you are connected to your flaws.

And that they trust you to find the balance and thrive authentically.

5) Trust them.

This is when I have to ask the question: do you feel as deeply loved by them as you do?

Because you can’t expect yourself to do all this work for someone who can’t reciprocate.

If the answer is yes, then that means there is room for trust to grow with a steady foundation.

And when you trust someone, that is the greatest love you can give because it means you’re willing to be vulnerable.

That also means when someone shows that they trust you, cherish it!

Some ways that you can show that you trust someone is by giving them space to explore life without your influence.

It’s also by being vulnerable with them and sharing aspects of yourself with them.

It’s sharing a life together and putting things on the line where it might suck if the relationship came to an end. But that risk is worth feeling close to them.

6) Encourage their growth.

Being patient and trusting their process means you believe in their growth! And you can do so by being proud of them!

Show up to their recitals if they play an instrument.

Tell others about their accomplishments!

It also involves working on yourself too so you maintain a balance in the relationship. And this way you can bond over the experience of growing together.

Not only does this keep the relationship feeling fresh and alive, but it also ensures that the love is coming from a positive and confident place.

It also keeps the both of you on the same page and level of maturity so you can come to one another for support if needed.

7) Be consistent with them.

This is one you prove over time.

It involves you taking care of yourself so you aren’t pouring from an empty cup.

People who pour from an empty cup often are inconsistent because they are emotionally or mentally dysregulated. 

It’s hard to be honest with someone who isn’t stable because you feel like you’re always walking on eggshells.

Wishy-washy people are also the type who can’t commit and will come in and out of your life depending on how they feel like behaving.

With no consideration for what you need or feel.

They might be doing their best, but the truth is that they shouldn’t be a source of love if what you’re looking for is consistency.

Being consistently loving means you are present and the other person doesn’t have to feel like they’re playing Russian Roulette around you.

That’s the kind of mindreading that can become unhealthy.

You don’t have to be perfect, but staying self-aware and taking care of your health is the best way to show you love someone through consistency. 

8) Fight and defend their uniqueness.

This can be integrated into all the other ways to love someone.

Through your actions, you can encourage this by showing your support when someone you love is trying something new!

It can mean keeping your negativity or worries to yourself because there’s no one that feels more nervous about a new chapter than the person going into it.

And I know the title says “without saying a word.” But you can show you love someone by defending them if someone talks badly about them behind their back.

To be frank, you aren’t saying any words to the person in question so I reckon this still works.

We are all vulnerable to coming across people who will try to attack us for being authentic. Most people are comfortable conforming or ignoring their true selves.

Sometimes, people will be inconsistent in their love depending on who is around them. But is it really love if you can turn it off based on what you’re trying to gain from your social interactions?

So when you are able to defend someone behind their back, you are expressing a love that encapsulates everything in this article above.

That you aren’t ashamed to be a part of their life, that your love for them lingers 24/7, and that you have a strong sense of self to not abandon your morals.

And of course, that you have their back no matter what.

Everyone feels love differently. 

Making sure the other person understands what you’re feeling should be a bigger priority than just showing it in a way that makes sense to you.

It also gives you the chance to experience love differently. Which exposes love for what it is.

As more than a few words or a feeling, and as an expansive experience.

And when you master the art of showing love non-verbally, those 3 words come to mean just that much more.

Because now they have all the memories and promises of trust that come flooding in when you say it.