Roselle Umlas
It’s a common misconception that aging is a thing to be feared, or at the very least, to be dreaded.
But I believe it’s all about having the right attitude. After all, not everyone gets to enjoy the privilege of growing old.
The beauty of aging is that it doesn’t need to be a burden. If you truly want to age gracefully, embracing positive changes is the key.
Let’s talk about certain behaviors that could be sabotaging your journey towards graceful aging. Here are 10 behaviors you might want to say goodbye to.
1) Ignoring your body’s needs
We’re starting with one that you’ve probably heard before. Listen to your body.
Our bodies communicate with us in various ways, often through feelings of discomfort or ease.
If you’re constantly tired, maybe it’s telling you to rest more.
Feeling sluggish? Perhaps you need to incorporate more fruits and veggies in your diet.
Ignoring these signals is akin to turning a deaf ear to a dear friend. For graceful aging, you need to maintain a robust conversation with your body, understanding its needs and responding appropriately.
Make changes to your lifestyle and self-care routine to accommodate these needs, whether that means:
- Adjusting your diet
- Taking up exercise
- Getting more sleep
- Getting regular check-ups
Your body will thank you in the long run.
2) Worrying
Now that we’ve gotten the physical part of aging down pat, let’s turn our focus to the mental and emotional aspects of aging.
First up is worrying, something I’m pretty sure a lot of us do.
There’s a fine line between concern and worry. Concern can motivate you to take action, but worry keeps you in a state of perpetual anxiety.
As you get older, it’s natural to fret about the future. However, constant worrying robs you of the joy in the present.
Try to catch yourself when you start to worry. Ask yourself, “What can I do right now to address this?”
If there’s something you can do, take action. If there’s nothing to be done, try to let go. Mindfulness and meditation practices can help in this regard.
Aging gracefully requires peace of mind, and a worry-free mindset is a big step in that direction.
3) Dwelling on the past
Just as it’s important to stop worrying about the future, dwelling on the past isn’t helpful either.
Past events, especially the ones that didn’t go as planned, have a way of staying with us. But staying stuck there is not conducive to aging gracefully.
Look, the past is a learning ground, not a dwelling ground. Take lessons from past experiences, but don’t let them dictate your present or future.
To age gracefully, we need to live in the present and work towards the future.
Remember, you are not defined by your past mistakes or regrets. You are defined by who you choose to be today, and that holds true whether you’re in your 20s, 30s, 80s, or 90s!
4) Holding on to grudges
This is another form of dwelling on the past. Nursing grudges is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to suffer.
It’s unhealthy, and it ages you prematurely. The longer you hold on to resentment, the longer you keep yourself chained to a past hurt.
Learning to forgive is essential to aging gracefully. But it doesn’t mean you have to forget or reconcile with the person who wronged you.
It’s about letting go of the burden of anger for your own peace of mind. You may find that once you let go of a grudge, a weight lifts off your shoulders, and you can go through life feeling much lighter and at peace.
5) Having a fixed mindset
Do you think you already know everything? That you’ve seen it all and done it all and there’s nothing new to learn?
That’s a fixed mindset, which is when we believe our abilities and talents are fixed traits that can’t be improved. This type of mindset can limit growth and hinder our ability to adapt to change — two qualities that are important in aging gracefully.
Try to cultivate a growth mindset instead. This means understanding that with effort, learning, and perseverance, you can grow your skills and abilities.
Embracing this mindset can not only help you adapt to the changes that come with aging, but also open up opportunities for personal development and fulfillment.
Plus, don’t you think each day feels more exciting when you know you’ve got something new to learn?
6) Being judgmental
The problem with having a fixed mindset is that it can contribute to an attitude of judgment.
Judging others, and even ourselves, is a negative behavior that can become a habit over time. This habit can lead to feelings of superiority or, conversely, insecurity, neither of which promote graceful aging.
Being judgmental also hampers our ability to understand and empathize with others’ experiences.
Begin your journey towards being less judgmental by practicing acceptance. Accept people for who they are, warts and all.
And don’t forget to accept yourself, with all your strengths and weaknesses. If you want to age gracefully, you’ve got to like yourself because you’ll be together for a long time, won’t you?
7) Suppressing your emotions
How do you deal with messy emotions? Do you squash them down deep inside you just to keep the peace?
That could get in the way of aging gracefully.
Emotions are a natural part of being human. Suppression of these emotions, especially the ones we perceive as negative, can lead to mental stress and physical health problems.
In order to age gracefully, we must allow ourselves to feel and express our emotions in a healthy way.
Feel your feelings, whether it’s happiness, sadness, anger, or fear. Acknowledge them, understand why you’re feeling them, and then let them pass.
If you find this difficult, you might find it helpful to journal your feelings or process them with a trusted friend or counselor.
8) Not managing stress
Speaking of messiness brings me to the topic of stress. To some degree, stress is acceptable, helpful even. It can keep us on our toes and push us to do better.
But chronic stress? Oh boy, that can do a real number on our bodies and accelerate the aging process.
Everyone experiences stress in different ways and it’s crucial to identify what triggers stress for you. Is it work pressure, family issues, financial problems? Identify the sources of stress and develop healthy coping mechanisms.
Here are a few ways you can manage stress in a healthy way:
- Taking a walk in nature
- Doing regular exercise
- Practicing mindfulness or doing yoga
- Finding a creative outlet like playing music, painting, or writing
- Learning to say no and setting clear boundaries
- Relaxing with friends
- Laughing!
By managing stress effectively, you can keep both your body and mind youthful, paving the way for graceful aging.
9) Avoiding social connections
See how “relaxing with friends” is on the list above? That’s because as humans, we’re wired for connection.
Social isolation can leave us feeling lonely and depressed – and that’s going to take a real toll on our mental and physical health. To age gracefully, maintaining strong social connections is key.
Stay connected with friends and family, or consider joining community groups or clubs that align with your interests.
Forming and maintaining relationships can help keep your mind sharp, improve your mood, and even extend your lifespan.
10) Taking life too seriously
The last point we have here might seem cliché, but it’s true. Don’t take life too seriously (see “laughter” on the list above). This is actually one of my guiding principles in life, and it truly helps me reframe aging positively.
Of course, it’s important to be responsible and considerate, but don’t forget to let loose and have a little fun.
As the saying goes, “Laughter is the best medicine,” and indeed, it can help you age with grace. So, laugh as loud as you want. Be silly. Pursue hobbies that make your heart swell with joy.
Embrace your inner child’s joy and curiosity, and you’ll find the journey of aging to be a more pleasant one.
Final thoughts
Aging gracefully isn’t about avoiding wrinkles or staying forever young. It’s about embracing the process with a positive mindset and leading a balanced, fulfilling life.
By letting go of these 10 behaviors, you’re not only paving the way for a graceful aging process, but also promoting a healthier, happier, and more content you.
